The less I write, the better I feel. Simple as that.
But today is different. I had a good day, I was feeling great and happy, had a good time. And then suddenly... The call of the void hit me.
For those who don't know what the call of the void is, I explain it. It's a sudden feeling, that all is meaningless and only death can bring a change for the better. The call of the void is responsable for many suicide attempts. If you ever read an article which is about an unexpected suicide, those people followed the call of the void.
A simple "Don't do it" doesn't really help. The call and I are old friends. I heard it often and didn't follow. I won't follow it today either. It tries tempting me, luring me to follow it. And I fight it with everything I have, like I always do. It won't win, I'm too strong. But I really fear the day when it calls me and I'm not strong enough anymore.
For now I keep myself busy. My cat felt it too, she came to me cuddling and purring. This little feline was often a life savor already.
I won't give up now, don't worry. The fight goes on.
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